Homecoming

She knew where everything was -- the piano, the old reading lamps, the weathered garden set. It was as if she flashbacked into the past, for a split second, and then she saw beyond the thick blanket of dust and white cloth that covered everything. She was all alone now, officially. She had just buried her last parent. Her brothers had settled in another country, never wanting to see Manila again. She had come back for no particular reason, but having no particular reason was as compelling as having one.

"Oh hello."

Someone, in a white flowing veil, snuck out of the doorway at the far end of the hall. The little girl stared back with her dark eyes.

"Hello," the little girl answered.

There was a jasmine flower stuck in the girl's ear. Missa felt the scent soak into her skin, the fragrant air dropping a few degrees colder. The girl started to walk very small, unsure steps toward the woman in front of her.

"You're back," the girl said.

Missa walked toward the girl, confident and business-like, as if meeting a new client.

"Well, I don't know for how long. How are you?" Missa asked. She even offered her hand to shake.

The girl scratched her nose and looked at the ceiling. What could possibly be more interesting than the spanish lamps hanging up there, she must have thought. "Your parents, they're all right, you know," she said.

Missa gazed at the girl. Then her hands trembled at her side; her chest tightened as if a balloon was inflating, wanting to burst her open into a mess of shattered organs, limbs, body parts. Her knees fell sharply to the floor. The pain was too much.

The girl clutched Missa's arms quickly-- she was very near her now. Missa shivered in her own tears, tears she kept from escaping when she went to the hospital to see her mother fading, shrinking into her bed. These were the same tears she hid with dark Gucci sunglasses at her father's burial.

"You shouldn't worry too much, Missa," the girl said again. She stroked Missa's hair with her pale bony hand, then wrapped her arms around Missa's grieving body. A few days from now, the girl thought, her friend will be back to her old self.

On the Street Where You Live

Awww...This boy is going to grow up a heartbreaker.

Absolutely Nothing

“It’s eight already.”

“Oh.”

“Aren’t we supposed to be in Portico’s by now?”

“Hmm.”

“What’s the matter?”

“It’s nice sitting here in a café. By ourselves. Do we really have to?”

“Yeah.”

“I suddenly don’t feel like going. I’m getting tired just thinking about it.”

“Got a text. Katz and Menands are there, waiting. Soon the rest are going to be there.”

“It’s going to be the same conversation…”

“We haven’t seen them in months, Sally.”

“But we email them all the time.” Sighs. It is the first of many.

“It’s not the same, okay.”

“You’re right. It’s not the same.”

There is a lull. “You’re still not getting up. Does this mean I have to convince you?”

“Tell me one thing, just one thing, that’ll make me want to get my ass over there.”

Sighs. Looks through the windows, then down at the pack of people in the park waiting, waiting. “I got it. And if this doesn't get you moving, I don’t know what. Wanna hear it?”

“Okay.”

Holds breath. Looks Sally in the eye. "Oliver."

Two seconds, Sally's up and running to Portico's.

FORWARDED MASSAGE (Classic)

NOTE: Isang classic forwarded email message. Nung nilipat ko ito sa Word, nagbreakdown yung grammar-check ng Microsoft. Kung sino man ang nagsulat nito, dapat kang bigyan ng award.

We' ve been friends for a long time ago. We come from the same alma mother. Actually, our paths crossed one time on another. But it's only now that I gave him a second look. I realized that beauty is in the eyes. The pulpbits of my heart went fast, really fast. Cute pala siya. And then, he came over with me. He said, "I hope you don't mine. Can I get your number?"

Nag-worry ako. What if he doesn't give it back? He explained naman na it's so we could keep intact daw. Sabi ko, "Connect me if i'm wrong but are you asking me ouch?"

"The!?!!??". .. ang sarcastic na sagot nya.

Aba! The verb! Parang siya pa ang galit! Persona ingrata!!! Ang kapal niya! I cried buckles of
tears.

Na-guilty yata siya. Sabi niya, isipin mo na lang na this is a blessing in the sky. Irregardless daw of his feelings, we should go ouch na rin.

Now, we're so in love. Mute and epidemic na ang past. Thanks God we swallowed our fried. Kasi, I'm 33 na and I'm running our time.

After 2 weeks, he plopped the question. "Will you marriage me?" I'm in a state of shocked. Kasi mantakin mo, when it rains, it's four! This is true good to be true. So siyempre, I said yes. Love is a many splendor.

Pero nung inaayos ko na ang aming kasal, everything swell to pieces. Nag-di-dinner kami noon nang biglang sa harap ng aming table, may babaeng humirit ng, "Well, well, well. Look do we have here." What the fuss! The nerd ng babaeng yon! She said they were still on. So I told her, Whatever is that, cut me some slacks! I didn't want this to get our hand kaya I had to sip it in the bud. She accused me of steeling her boyfriend. As is!!! I don't want to portrait the role of the other woman.

Gosh, tell me to the marines! I told her, "please, mine you own business!" Who would believe her anyways? Dahil it's not my problem anymore but her problem anymore, tumigil na rin siya ng panggugulo. Everything is coming up daisies. I'm so happy. Even my boyfriend said like twice. He's so supportive. Sabi niya, "Look at is this way. She's our of our lives."

Kaya advise ko sa inyo - take the risk. You can ever can tell. Just burn the bridge when you get there. Life is shorts. If you make a mistake, we'll just pray for the internal and external repose
of your soul. I second emotion.

My Ego is As Big As This Planet

"Did you get to read this?"

"Yeah."

"You think it's you he's referring to?"

"Of course not. I wouldn't dream of it."

"So why did he run a script?"

"He's probably bored. Or going back to his stage roots."

Scratches head. "Stage roots?"

"On stage. Like a drama. He wrote plays. He also used to be an actor."

"The word 'stalk' also appeared..."

"It shouldn't mean anything."

"You wrote about stalking days ago. A full week ago."

"The word 'stalking' isn't copyrighted. He's free to do what he wants."

"You're such a liar."

"You're saying I'm a liar." (Repeats because she has just gotten out of an emotions management seminar.)

"Deep inside, you're looking for an affirmation from one of the country's bemedalled writers."

"Off it."

"You're human. It's normal to feel that way."

"I am so not listening. ... But I am wondering what prompted him though. I wonder which blog he was referring to."

"It's *this* blog."

"Come on. Sobra ka naman."

"Uyy... kinikilig sya..."

"Di noh! I don't have a big ego. I am so humble it makes me weep."

"So how do you think he's 1) using a script 2) uses the word ego 3) referring the blog author is a girl."

"He doesn't say the author's a girl."

"But he keeps hiding the gender. Ergo, female."

"What?"

"I think we should get dinner. My ulcer's going straight to my head." Starts to pack. "Would be nice to think it was really me though. Wished he'd comment or something."

END.

But Of Course, James!

From Shameless.

Cold Feet and Destiny

"You're home early. How was it?"

"Terrible."

"You were Little Miss Sunshine before you left this morning..."

"I know. I fucked it up."

"Language."

"Who cares. "

"What happened?"

"Ten minutes before I got out of the cab, I chickened out."

"Attack of the cold feet?"

"I don't know. Maybe I'll never grow up. I can't stand rejection. And it would be my third try to ask him out. And it's awful that I had to wait until the art session was over before I could subtlely and tastefully ask him if he'd like to join me for dinner."

"Aww, that is so lame."

"Not to someone who's been doing the chasing. Mother Nature would have smacked me for being Ms Desperate. I'm tired. I'm a walking sad story. After the presentation I just walked out of the gallery and drowned myself in cafe mocha. I finished 2 ventis."

"This is the 21st century. There is nothing wrong with chasing... Wait, I think the correct term should be 'being proactive.'"

"I have a 21st century retort to that. 'He's not that into me.'"

Pause. "Maybe it's you who's not that into him."

Pause. "That's possible."

Removes shoes. Sits down and swings legs on the arms of sofa.

"I'm probably not meant to be with anyone."

"Shush! That's not true."

"It's sad, but it could be, you know. It's not a bad thing -- being single. Maybe this is the way life's meant to be for me."

"Oh, don't give up because of one little mishap."

"It's been a series of mishaps, my dear. And it's not giving up. Maybe it's ... having an epiphany." Looks to sister. "Are you happy with your boyfriend?"

"Let's not change the subject, shall we?"

"My point exactly. Maybe everyone's supposed to be single. We're not built for conflict on a 24 seven basis."

"How about procreation?"

"People have sex all the time, and most of the time there's no emotional connection. It's just body part this and body part that rubbing against each other. Nothing substantial comes from it. It's just a waste of energy."

"That's not true."

"How do you know?"

Pregnant pause again. "Where is all this coming from?"

"The fact that I'm thirty. I'm single. I'm successful but I don't feel I'm living."

"Aunt Celia got married when she was fifty. There's still hope."

"If you're asking me to post my profile on that internet dating service, get off it. I got one out there in the virtual universe and it's disappointing that no one, NO ONE, ever dropped me a line."

"You're angry."

"My eggs are going to die without even seeing a shadow of a sperm cell. I might not have children. Like Aunt Celia. Like old, withered, frigid, Auntie Celia."

"You should talk to her. Aunt Celia. She'll change your mind, am sure of it."

"Where is she?"

"On her honeymoon cruise with John. They're...," looks at watch,"in Seychelles by this time."

"Do you believe in fate? Destiny?"

"Yes. It's my favorite premise in any chick flick."

"Well, I was waiting for the Simpson's movie to start last night, in Rockwell. I was in Fully Booked. Bumped into an old classmate. She had two of her friends along -- a girl and a guy. The guy and I got on pretty well..."

"You got it on?"

"Ano ba? What I meant was 'rapport.' When the movie was about to start, I felt a bit sad because we'd be in separate seats. Because we didn't buy our tickets at the same time. It was really strange you know..."

"Suspense. I can't stand suspense."

"We went in opposite directions, them left, me right. But we arrived at the same row. The guy and I turned out to be seatmates. "

"That's destiny."

"It's not."

"How could you say that when there was a score of other seats available and you two were meant to sit together? You had no hand in the choosing."

"Well, I gave him my business card later after the show. He has not called me since last night. He's not that into me."